One night, I was kneeling beside “my” bed in New York (on my J127 trip), praying hard.
I was telling God that I wanted to get closer to Him–and He said, in that special way that only He can,
“Carissa, I’m right here.”
But, somehow, I had forgotten. I was thinking I had to run and climb and claw my way closer.
I was writing to a friend about this whole “running to God” thing a long time ago, and their reply was, “You want to know how to run to Him. You don’t have to run. He is right there.”
I thought that was a nice thought, but I didn’t quite… get it. Not until that night in New York.
And I still forget, sometimes.
I forget that He Himself has brought me near: “But now in Christ Jesus you who once were far off have been brought near by the blood of Christ.”
I forget that He has promised to never leave me: “For He Himself has said, “I will never leave you nor forsake you.””
I forget that all things consist in Him: “And He is before all things, and in Him all things consist.“
And I forget that He has told us to abide–to just stay—in His love: “As the Father loved Me, I also have loved you; abide in My love.”
But… *smiles* I remember all those things, too.
And I am learning–He is teaching me–to constantly be aware of His presence. To realize that He has not moved–I have. He is still there–only I have forgotten or I have turned my back. But He is always here. Here, wherever you are. Here, wherever I am.
Even when you don’t feel it, He is here. Have faith.
Turn to Him in your heart, and love Him for being